Are we confusing goals, achievements and the perception of success with happiness? And what happens if we reach the ‘success’ that we desire and still don’t feel the happiness we thought we would…
It feels like we’re surrounded by so much information these days; opportunities, success stories, go-for-your-goals memes, followers, digital productivity, wellness podcasts – that we’re all essentially on a fast-paced treadmill, trying to race to the finish line of success, and be completely perfect at the same time. Whatever that looks like.
We’d like to think that we’d have learned the mistake of buying into the 90’s American Dream – two cars, big house, how-to-be-successful books, being openly monetary-charitable, attending life coach seminars and the rest of it – but it doesn’t feel like things have changed much – because a new generation is basically consuming the same mantras, but in a digital guise.
We already discovered that those pillars of perceived ‘success’ turned out to be, well basically a lie, so it’s interesting we’re still desperate to strive for material, monetary and social goals as though it will be our golden ticket to being happy.
“Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” – Albert Einstein.
We’re under such a microscope these days, and in some ways, everyone is in the public eye. Our perception of success and what’s good for us is surely warped by a conscious or unconscious bias to what people think of us. Largely fuelled by a social media led culture.
How will our next job update look on LinkedIn, what response will the next photo of me get on Instagram, how is everyone I went to school or university with doing in life vs me. How interesting does the persona I’ve made on Twitter look. You can see it all, in real time. Surely that’s not healthy for our true selves – and we all know it isn’t the full picture of others, either.
At this point I feel like it’s almost a universal truth that some of the tools to happiness include gratitude, awareness – and most importantly giving back (to others) … therefore, effectively having a sense of empathy.
But I don’t think these moral rules were necessarily ever going to take into account the virtue signalling culture that would flood into humanity.
Can we give back, do good, and live our lives with gratitude without having to share and promote it to others? Because true selflessness does not require a need for validation.
It makes me wonder how many of us have become so smokescreened by the information we consume so regularly on digital channels, and our new world culture, that we can no longer identify what makes US happy, we’re only good at making our persona happy.
Leading with intuition
This year I want to keep striving to follow my intuition more – and tune off as much as possible from external sources that I think (could) skew what makes me truly happy.
So, leading with the things that give you a sense of connectedness and purpose. And by contrast, avoiding the temporary highs; the things that look good on paper and match a description of what is successful to society.
Surely, staying well connected to your intuition, despite external blocking factors, is the best way to live your life, be truly connected – and happy.
Saturn Return Diary 